Chapter Four: The Reason

     From before the sun I have had my baby. 

    Dreams are private places when they are natural, and my child being in dreams from my birth is older than my life here. In order for me to have my baby grow I have to have her out "here" in a reality with time, space, matter, and all other kinds of good stuff. In order to have her "here" I have to find a suitable mate and then tear them apart into dreams in a way, while waiting to do it in this life.

    No takers? Understandable. 

    Recently the curiosity and want of men to enter my life has led to them trying to soul pull me around that it left her vulnerable to saturnists intending on ripping her and I apart.

    Their dreams and satan's realm are different that where and what I do in dreams. We usually fight. 
    When they could not find something high enough they tried to hack a way for me to attack me. 

    It is complicated. 

    When leaving and entering a dream I resemble something like a langelier, ripping and shredding the exit in my wake. It is being a descendent of the TRex in reptilian blood line that helps me scream things apart and is a source of why we do what we do. 

    That form also helped me heal the wrist torture that stephanie did to me as a baby.

    Are not time and space continuums confusing. Cause and effect have a line, other stuff jumps around in ways you barely know, but might remember tomorrow if I want you to. 

*Insert a wink*

    Thinking it's hard to change the human memory across the world is arrogant. 
    Thinking I can't change everything else to fit it, is just plain wrong. 

    They woke me suddenly with a kick to the head, connecting pain there to here and I ripped all around me while still away from that door that I use. 

    Ouchie wah wah, to say the least. 

    I am done with you people indefinitely. That is WHY the lack of effort and the lack of WANT. Time to live as a recluse or a moored. Just to avoid the bullshit of fake policing. There have only been two good cops in three years of nearly constantly calling. 

    How hard is to understand just because something is different does not make it bad or the same as the differences you know. You do not need to STUDY everything. 

    I could have been chaste a whole existence with her waiting for me and not cared. 
    I know that. More so than I knew on venus. 
    Those that truly know ME know that. The few that do. 
    Then to find out about the rape, I was devastated. I blamed the splitting, but if I remember clearly there were signs of annoyance in her at me so many times. 
    Still there was a way I comforted me. 

    If I ever find a being to endure the hardships of this life with, I will need to find one that can handle me loving me.

    No wonder maynard's album pictured a burning Detroit. 
     This is where the satanists and saturnists live.

    If only the evil stupidity of coveters had not led to me staying in this forsaken state. 
    And it is forsaken when I leave, regardless of how I leave it. Then after this whole first life is into an after life, things change drastically. 
    Then a few of me might emerge and start cleaning up mess after mess.

    How dare they believe that dark seed that hatched from my fallen relative's loins. 
    She is only here to pervert and play innocent beings near a pit.
    Her favorite trick to get the innocent to suffer is that helpless stare with a killer intent behind it. 

    She is after my baby. She is after my reason for being or growing an Earth.